How to Have Self Confidence

After the mega hit of ‘a delicious recipe for sexy confidence‘, ya’ll told me you wanted more!

Well now we’re digging deep.

We’re going in full speed ready to get your self confidence and quality of life up to where you want it.. Beaming with awesomeness!

As you know, anything you want that will be liberating and rewarding for you requires time, patience and effort. (Hell that’s the “secret” recipe for everything in life!) You gotta decide now whether you can be assed putting this effort into you. Because I tell ya, it will test you and challenge you and push you to your limits. One moment you’re on cloud nine, next you’re balling your eyes out to the bottom of a Ben and Jerry’s.

You get what you put in. If you do the work once today, maybe once next month and for 2 days the next week, your results are gonna be scattered and make you feel like a class-A schizophrenic. If you’re gonna half-ass it, you’re gonna get half-assed results. If you take little steps each day, you’ll get better and better each day. Get it?

There is no mystery recipe to life except that it gives you exactly what you put into it.

So in order to gain self confidence and feel good about yourself you must start with baby steps.

How to Have Self Confidence & Feel Good About Yourself

List your past achievements

Get out the self-love journal and make a list of all of your past achievements big or small. From the compliment you got on the red lipstick you wore to the most outstanding achievement certificate you got in primary school – name it ALL and get DAMN proud of it all. Be like your former 5yr old who gets the medal and does nothing but stare at it, talk about it and praise it.

Write out your strengths

Time to dig a lil deeper. I recently did this exercise in terms of discovering what my acting strengths were and it took quite a while but I got a good list in the end. On a new page in your journal, write your strengths – yes even if it’s guzzling a pint Guinness in 5 seconds flat.

What’s important to you?

On a new page in your journal, write out what is important to you right now. What values do you have? What will you not tolerate? What friends, boyfriends and family members are #1 on your list? What must you do every morning, afternoon and evening? How often? Write it all out and create a personal map for yourself.

Where do you wanna go?

I’ll admit one of my favourite exercises – write out exactly where you want to head in life. Even if it’s multiple places, just write it out – get it out. Do you want to travel and have a career? Do you want money and independence? What about a relationship and babies? Do you want apples or oranges? Puppies or kittens? Bargain or couture? Money or spirituality? Don’t worry if one contradicts each other, just write everything that comes to mind.

Commit to yourself

Make a promise to yourself that you will do this work, that you will strive for success no matter what obstacles you face. Knowing that they’ll pop up is a strong part in making them less powerful. Write a statement or declaration to yourself in your journal that you will do this. Kinda like my 4 simple goals I created the other week.

Set small goals

Give yourself something to work toward every 1 – 3 months. Take up a class of something you’ve always wanted to do like dancing or sewing. Join a sports club that you’ve been interested in or start learning that language you’ve always been fascinated by. And at the end of each completed goal, reward yourself with something you like.

Work on the mind

So simple to say, but it’s actually gotta become a daily practise. Whether it’s meditating, reading, affirming, researching, manifesting, visualizing, focusing etc each day you gotta commit to working on your mind. Because anything you want to change and create starts with your mind. You gotta work on the actual source to get to where you wanna go.

Confront your insecurities

Now it’s time to go deeper. On another page in your journal, write out all your fears and insecurities. Whatever comes up just write it out. Some will be ones you’ve known about, others will come out of nowhere. The important thing here is to get them out and know what they are so you can work through them

Talk it out with friends

You’re bound to have at least one friend you can talk about all of this stuff with and ask for advice. You’ll be surprised to know that most people go through the same things and if some of your friends have already been through it, you have a great little support network right there.

Look for others you admire

What I mean is, look for people who you feel are like you but are where you wanna be and start interacting with them or research the crap outta them. Start applying the things they do and find out if it works for you.

Get your gratitude on

And last but certainly not least, give the gratitude! Show your appreciation for being here and for being you. Be grateful for your brand new confidence and your sassy new attitude. Basically just adopt a characteristic and gratefulness!

Confidence will lead you to success
So there ya go! Lots to work with but if you take it in baby steps you’ll find that it’s actually easy to apply. To get to where you truly want to be, you gotta start from the inside out. Remember not to rush, you can’t rush your learning process. But with each new thing you apply you will find yourself getting more and more confident each day.

Have fun!
Elise xo
  • Wow, that is a lot of work (particularly when I do struggle with my better qualities and strengths). But, I am willing to give it a go. Thanks for the inspiration 🙂

  • No probs Becc!

    I remember reading somewhere that our 'self work' is the hardest work we will ever do – and yet the most rewarding!

    I totally buy that 🙂 xx